Just Jokes

Bowlers – their own language

Bowls has its very own language – totally confusing to anyone who hasn’t played the game:

  • Good weight = lousy line
  • Good line = lousy weight
  • Good try = lousy line, lousy weight
  • Good back bowl = I thought that was in the ditch
  • Good blocker = that’s in my way
  • That could be useful up there = that bowl is closer to you than it is to the jack
  • There’s always next time = you sure didn’t get it this time
  •  I’d bowl with him any day = he always buys the first round


  The club’s top bowler, a guy who had won every club championship numerous times, was well-known for carrying a little black book which he regularly consulted during games.  Whenever he stood on the mat with a particularly tricky situation, he would take out this little book and then make a brilliant shot.  Eventually he died and there was great interest in this book.  Many of the club’s members approached the man’s widow asking what she was planning to do with this legendary book.  As a shrewd woman, she decided to auction the book to the highest bidder.  The auction was held at the club and after some very spirited bidding a member, who had often finished second to the now-deceased champion, took possession of the much sought-after  book.  He could scarcely wait to take the book home and peruse its pages at leisure.  He sat himself down in his study and began to leaf through the pages – and he found that most of the pages were blank!  He finally came to a single page that had one sentence on it.  It said:

“Small circle on the inside.”


Definition of a Novice:

A new convert to bowls who confesses he knows nothing about the game and then becomes angry when you agree with him.


I rang up my local bowling club, I said “Is that the local bowling club?”

He said “It depends where you’re calling from.”